Bar Mitzvah Brochure
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Bar Mitzvah etiquette
for the non-Jew - Hi! I am a Christian lady whose sister married
a wonderful Jewish man about 18 years ago. They have 3 children and are
raising them in the Jewish faith. My family is very excited that their son's
Bar Mitzvah is coming up, but I am concerned about the proper etiquette
for a non-Jew at the ceremony. I know very little about the meaning and
purpose of a Bar Mitzvah. I would like to know what may take place, what
is expected of the family, and maybe what an appropriate gift would be.
My brother and his family live in another state and although we have a wonderful
relationship, I would hate to "bother" them with my questions! I would appreciate
any advice or tips!
Can non-Jews have aliyahs? - Is it a sin for a non-Jew to be invited to chant an aliyah during a Bar Mitzvah?
Do you have to be Bar Mitzvah to wear a black hat? - Do you have to be at least 13 years old and be bar mitzvah'd to wear a black hat?
Does a person have to be bar mitzvahed to wear a tallit? - Does a person have to be bar mitzvahed to wear a tallit?
How did Kaplan create the Bat Mitzvah? - How did Kaplan create the Bat Mitzvah?
How much studying is required for a Bar Mitzvah? - I am the single parent of a son who recently turned 13 yrs old. I spoke to a rabbi last year about finding out what steps needed to be taken so he could be bar mitzvahed and was told that he would have to study Hebrew for 2 years. No one in my family speaks any Hebrew, and quite honestly, it is all that I can do to make certain that my son does his regular school work so the idea of trying to force even more studying on him is not a pleasant one (besides the fact that with that timetable he could not possibly be bar mitzvahed at 13). I feel it is very important for my son to explore and embrace his Jewish heritage and he was looking forward to this as well. To further complicate matters, he would like all of his friends (all non-Jews) to attend, and we may be relocating for employment purposes rather soon. Is there some way of getting him the study that he needs so that he can still have the bar mitzvah that he wants without having to wait 2 years. I don't know what my denomination is but I am closest to "reformed" or 'Reconstructionist." I would appreciate any help or advice that you can give me.
I want to know some historical matters about the history of Bar Mitzvah. - I am going to my neice's Bat Mitzvah so I would like to be informed about some rather mundane historical matters.What is the history of Bar mitzvah - and later Bat mitzvah? i.e. When (date) did the custom start? Where? Who started it and why did he? By this I mean what was the rationale to create this rite of passage? Some particular synagogue - or group of them - introduced the bat mitzvah ceremony relatively recently. Its certainly no more than fifty years old. Which synogogue and where was it located? And which Rabbi?
If you are getting Bat-Mitzvahed what are the age ranges? - If you are getting Bat-Mitzvahed what are the age ranges?
Is there significance to lighting Bar/Bat Mitzvah candles? - What is the significance of the lighting of candles at a bar/bat mitzvah? Where did this custom come from? My son will become a bar mitzvah in June of 1997. We are having a luncheon in our back yard following the service. We were not planning to light any candles. Is this appropriate?
Should a Bar Mitzvah be on Friday night or Saturday morning? - In a congregation that has both Friday night and Saturday morning services weekly, is there a preference to having Bar or Bat Mitzvahs on either of those two days?
What do the 13 candles lit at a Bar or Bat Mitzvah represent? - At a Bar or Bat Mitzvah, during a candle lighting ceremony what do each of the 13 candles represent?
What is the history of the Bar Mitzvah? - What is the origin and history regarding the establishment of the Bar Mitzvah. When was it established in Jewish practice and why?
What is the importance of Bar/Bat Mitzvah? - What is the importance of Bar/Bat Mitzvah to the Jewish young and to the Jewish community?
What is the Jewish age of accountability? - Can you tell me what the Jewish 'age of accountability' is? Is it age 19, 20 or 21? How did the Jews come up with this specific age for accountability purposes? Wouldn't the 'age of accountability' depend more on the child's maturity rather than a specific age? If not, why? Is it true that any mistakes prior to the 'age of accountability' are considered for Jewish purposes to be a "childish/foolish mistake"? At what time in history did this "age 21" become custom with the Jews? Was this custom held by all Jews in Biblical times and can you cite references? Is it possible that the "age of accountability" ties in with the bar mitzvah today? Were children stoned for "childish, foolish mistakes" in the Biblical text?
When did the Bar Mitzvah ceremony originate? - I would like to know when the Bar Mitzvah came into place and if this was something that came from the Talmud.
When should a girl become Bat Mitzvah? - I am an 11 year old (almost 12) consevative Jew. I am planning to have my Bat-mitzvah when I am 13 instead of the recomended age of 12. I was wondering if it was wrong to have when I was 13 and decide to have it when im 12 instead. Because some people are telling me that it is wrong to have it when im 13. And im just wondering if its wrong to have it when im 13 and also what age do you recomend and why?
Why are girls Bat Mitzvah at age 12 and boys at age 13? - Why are girls bat-mitzvah at age 12 and boys at age 13? And why does it seem that we are now waiting until girls are 13 years old? Please explain bat-mitzvah significance.
Why do we present a Talit to Bar Mitzvot boys? - Why do we present a Talit to Bar Mitzvot boys?
Why does a Bar Mitzvah boy have to read Torah? - Why does a bar-mitzvah boy have to do Torah, Haftorah or [if Lubavitch] say a maamar?
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